Had a super dups fun time with some of my fave people on planet Earth yesterday. Cheerios to cow-lookalikes, habibis, customized drinks, glass-clinking and happy families! Enjoyed every bit of the night- more of them to come! =)

And finally...I've laid hold of my THIS IS OUR GOD DVD+CD! Well, it really did seem like eons since I last got myself a CD (i.e. yes, I always do the illegal, especially for secular songs!).

Also got the DVD/CDs for my dearest connect group leaders: thanks for being so willing to run alongside with me. The battle is not easy and I know we have certainly been facing so much opposition and all, but I'm sure if we keep praying like we did today in CGM, keep being a positive inspiration to our members in both prayer and actions (remember: don't just be relevant, be radical too!); God will come through for us.

No one promised it to be easy to be strong, to have a strong inner strength, to be able to be like Jill and Mike in their strong internal intent; BUT narrow is the path to victory! Keep your eyes upon the promises yea? ;)

"By His stripes we are healed."

This is the God we serve. This is the God I worship. This is the God I love. This is the God that leaves me powerless...in His strength and embrace.

What do you choose to magnify in your life?

HEALER
You hold my every moment
You calm my raging seas
You walk with me through fire
And heal all my disease
I trust in You
I trust in You

I believe You're my Healer
I believe You are all I need
I believe You're my Portion
I believe You're more than enough for me
Jesus You're all I need

Nothing is impossible for You
Nothing is impossible for You
Nothing is impossible for You
You hold my world in Your hands

This is the story of Mike Guglielmucci- a man diagnosed with cancer, who came home, sat down, and wrote this song from start to finish without any prior preparation. This is a song from God our Healer. Mike recalled the day he prepared to go up on stage to sing this song, the putting on of the oxygen mask, the walking up to stage in agony and pain, it was a battle he was fighting...that he knew He would win.

There is a God bigger than our circumstances, and that does not just reside in words, pronto.

DESERT SONG
VERSE 1
This is my prayer in the desert
When all that's within me feels dry
This is my prayer in my hunger and need
My God is the God who provides

VERSE 2
This is my prayer in the fire
In weakness or trial or pain
There is a faith proved of more worth than gold
So refine me Lord through the flame

CHORUS
I will bring praise,
I will bring praise
No weapon formed against me shall remain
I will rejoice, I will declare
God is my victory and He is here

VERSE 3
This is my prayer in the battle
When triumph is still on its way
I am a conqueror and co-heir with Christ
So firm on His promise I'll stand

BRIDGE
All of my life
In every season
You are still God
I have a reason to sing
I have a reason to worship

VERSE 4
This is my prayer in the harvest
When favour and providence flow
I know I'm filled to be emptied again
The seed I've received I will sow.

I'm so inspired by the story behind this song. It brings tears to me whenever I view the youtube vid behind it, and I see of how one woman chooses to issue her statement of intent to the devil.

Jill McCloghry is a worship leader in Hillsong Australia. At 6 months into her pregnancy, she went into labour and gave birth to little Max, who stayed in the neo-natal ICU. This happened just a week before Jill was meant to record the Desert Song. However, the day before the recording, her little boy held out no longer and left Mummy. The emotions of loss and pain raged through her, yet she said: "Sometimes I don't feel like singing to God. But I remember that my circumstance in this season doesn't change, that God is still God. It doesn't change what God's called me to be, or what He's called me to do...He's still bigger than everything that I'm facing." Strength found in brokenness...

B.Darren shared about being aggressive in spirit. One can be 'S' in personality, but in the spirit, there is a certain 'D'-ness. There is an unyielding spirit. There in an inner intent that pushes depression and disappointment out, there is an inner intent to not allow the devil an inch.

Jill mentioned she was unable to feel the presense of God the way it used to be, perhaps due to her brokenness and sadness. Yet, she knew it was going to be okay, she knew God still remains, and she kept singing. On the day of recording, the presense of God that she was so familiar with came, in power and glory.

I guess as leaders, it gets difficult to lead, to sing, to preach; when you yourself are unable to reach beyond your current struggles. The normal member can just sit back and allow herself to be ministered to, but no, you as the leader needs to take a hold of yourself and do whatever it takes to reach out to God. There is a difference between preaching versus preaching from your heart, and singing versus singing from your heart. It's a challenge to do the latter, but I want to be that- and I know the eyes of the Lord will be attracted to those who worship and lead in such manner. There will be an authority that flows from such. There will be a weight to such singing and leading.

Alot of times, there will not be a full understanding of things. Giving thanks in the midst of trials, glorifying God when negative thoughts and doubt ravage in your mind...yet, you trust that God is STILL God, He never changes. And that brings meaning to it all again.

The triumph WILL come.

A picture (or rather, a collage of it) speaks a thousand words. Nuff' said.
Lane, I'm sure you'll love this pic. See, my editing skills quite good right? And you have learned the art of how to 'hold your hair' and give an ultra Sadako face. Ru2 ci2 ke2 jiao1 ye3! And yes, this last pic should be dedicated to that man who thinks he is very funny! Call police catch you already...fear for your life! And in advance before I last see you in Xndo on Sunday, here's me wishing you all the best in your life: may every single area of your life be happy yeppy zappy! *loves!*

A new interest has arisen in me for Blythe (aka vintage) dolls, after I found one that reminded me of myself. Check out Peony...perhaps I should go for that fringe too: is that a sign?

The "WHATEVER" post has been removed.

Devil, you lose.
My God wins.
=)

The verdict's out. It has proved yet again. Know the truth, and it shall set you free. Who you are, where you are, what to do. Now the direction's clear. So there is a use to it then, after all. You go, girl.

And now
Let the weak say I am strong
Let the poor say I am rich
Because of what the Lord has done
For us
Give thanks!

Then suddenly (okay no pun intended for those who know), this song came to me as I was about to start blogging. Y'know, it's so true that EVERYONE (no matter how solid and high-up-there one appears to be) needs to be affirmed, needs to know they matter, needs to know someone believes in them, despite their weaknesses. There will be countless times we feel so not up to it as compared to others, yet it's crucial we know God's grading system (if there must be one) does not work by bell curve (yes I hear your ahhs, uni students...), there is never a comparison with others. We are created special, unique individuals; to fulfil the calling specific for our lives; to please God, not to please people.

Anyway, on another note, there have been quite a couple of misunderstandings amongst us recently. Well, I guess in times of stress (which is a good thing for us actually huh? ;)), certain issues naturally manifest themselves. Both the pretty and not-so-pretty ones. I guess we got understand that that's just how God created us different! All are unpolished sapphires, diamonds, rhinestones etc., and when we come together, sparks fly. But it's another thing in itself to give of our talents and allow our weaknesses to be corrected. We are truly destined to make a difference. Let's move on from the past, put aside our differences, and move on yea? =) I still love YOU!

On yet another note, yes everyone knows how random I am (evident especially when I preach...haha!), was reading a colleague's blog and she was mentioning how she met a lady today who came in for a consultation that lasted more than 2 hours (normally it takes 45mins-1hour). This lady ended up sharing her hurts with my colleague, and on how she picked herself up from the valley when she met someone who was willing to love her: thus her intention to give her best and be in ideal weight.

You know, having worked with Viv for some time, I realised people have an innate need to share, if only people will listen. Viv too had her fair share of PUCs who came in with the intention to lose weight coz they wanted to look good for someone they love, they didn't want to be criticised and laughed at by others, they wanted to feel secure and good about themselves, they wanted to be able to find a job...etc. Very often, Viv will take ages in the consultation, and I learnt that was because these people will naturally be led to share their problems with her. Weight problems are an integral part of self-image, and very much linked to whether one walks confident, or bogged down by the weight physically and emotionally.

It's powerful how a my job does not just deal with the physical, but I am able to speak words of life into the emotionally wounded. It's an honor and privilege to behold: to love and manifest the love of God through our consultations. PT once told my boss that he was so excited for this vision that we have to help people achieve lifelong ideal weight healthily, coz every one needs to not only have a strong spirit, soul, but also body. Xndo...we minister to the 'body'.

I can't wait to start practising...can I not take the exams by the way then? Hee...pretty pleasE?

P/S: I realised I have not been taking any pics for eons...that explains the lack of them here. Someone please motivate me to take pics? ;)

Thanks Diana for the mini brownies- taste awesome and like the ones I bake (hee...allow me some room for publicity!). =)
Thanks Phoebe for Jellybean Junior- it carries different flavors from its parent! =)
Thanks S.Angela for the Orange Body Butter and for loaning me your poddie- indirectly it'll bless my readers here too, coz they get to read how Joel Osteen's sermons have blessed me! =)

Thanks thanks thanks to 3 of the most important women in my life! BFFs! *applause please...* I feel MUCH happier mentioning that already. Hee...

Anyway, just want to share a lil of what spoke to me today: to all you salt and light people out there. So if you are one or aspire to be one, listen up!

Once, there was this principal of a school who selected 3 top teachers and 90 top students: his objective was to have these 3 teachers accelerate the learning pace of these students. The students were excited and proud to know that they were the cream of the crop, and so did the teachers- to have the honor of the principal himself highlighting that! And so, the happy teachers went ahead teaching the ever-willing to learn students. After some time, it was realised that the students had gone ahead in more than 30% of the syllabus as compared to their peers, but what was the part we should cheer about is that...the principal reviewed these teachers were not the supposed best teachers and neither were the students: they were just randomly selected as part of a pilot trial test for this system!

I thought that was so sweet in itself: the power of having people believe in you. This week during service we saw many set free from the grieve and disappointment of life, and it struck me that many were not disappointed with others, but most often, the disappointment lie with themselves. I guess that is so commonplace in modern Singapore: and that's why we need to have a belief system made up of positive truth spoken, and not the lies of the devil!

To be a people builder, we need to invest in people- even before they become successful. From young, Joel Osteen himself had people around him tell him that he was going to be a powerful minister of God to the world, and look where he is now. Conversely, 70% of convicts have had people tell them they were going to jail in their youth! No wonder right? We need to speak faith into people, and you will realise that subconsciously, they will rise to that expectation, coz it has been incorporated as part of their belief system. These will no longer remain words, but treasures that they will carry through life with.

Our thoughts will never be a blessing, a good intention will always remain only a thought- unless they are spoken out. You'll never know how much it matters to someone precious to you to know that they matter to you, that they are indispensable.

Have you been a blessing in your words amd actions today to the people who matter?

I guess as Christians, i.e. the salt and light of this world, we always innately want to shine for Jesus and be a living example of the gospel. To me, that is the way I want to share the gospel to my colleagues and friends: not to verbally share it 1st, but to use the way I communicate and carry myself to show that Jesus lives in me. That there is a different spirit in me, yet stay relevant and not overtly perfect and spiritual.

Yet, there are times we falter and our emotions get the better of us. Pst Mike shared with us before that emotions are signals of what goes on in our heart. It's always a good thing to have your love tank refilled daily to prep one for the challenges of tomorrow, but sometimes, that is not as possible in its entity coz of the magnitude of it all. Sometimes, in our quest to want to stand up for the truth, to justify that conviction that we live by, to be a non-compromising person; we do take things a little too hard. When things go wrong, we put so much effort to want to realign it, but turn around and realise that hey, why is it that I'm the only one trying to fix this? Doesn't this matter at all to you? How can you take it so lightly?

Sometimes, we become so much a fighter for the truth that we feel more than the absense of physical humanity around us, it seems too to register that even God is not in this with us. I've been led to wonder why is it that Jesus was able to walk through so much humiliation and yet not react, and discovered that the reason lies in Him knowing that it was something He had to go through, so there was no point fighting or resisting it. There was always a lesson to be learnt through it, and so, the important question is 'what can I take from this?'. I guess Jesus kept His eyes on the Father: He knew God was His advocate, that God sees the big picture and will make all things work together for the good for those who love Him, in the end. (And this verse is so personal to me, its my verse of the year that will dictate my life for 2008: read late Dec or early Jan's entry).

Yes, as much as we lose sight that the battle is ours to fight with God and not alone, it takes a gentle spirit to incline towards the whisper of the Holy Spirit and listen for what lies beneath. Sometimes we want to stand up for the truth so much, we want to be armed and clad for battle whereever we go; that we forget the silent voice that is always in the race with us.

It's never meant for us to walk alone.

Strength...can one have too much of it manifested?

Convictions...can one be standing up too much for them?

Intentions...can they be too right till they turn wrong?

You are the truth, the advocate for my life.
Yours is a joy they cannot quench. Yours is a peace circumstances cannot steal.
Your gentle whisper nudges me to be strong. Your applause edges me to walk on.

To be like Jesus...

When I'm with You I don't have to fear...

For I know You are faithful till the end.

Thanks for being the love of my life.
Thanks for showing me what it means to trust and obey.
Thanks for giving me friends who are always around in time of need.
Thanks for the access to your blessing, healing and anointing.
Thanks for giving me a bigger heart.
Thanks for the opportunity to love and serve beyond myself.
Thanks for the strength to rise above my challenges and walk on.
Thanks for helping me to live a life of conviction.
Thanks for leading me on in the will of God meant for me.
Thanks for showing me the valley is mine to walk out of.

It means so much to know that You are on my side, my dearest cheerleader. And so, I'll walk on. In faith, hope and love.

Zoe Gabrielle Teo




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